Finding You
by SuperWhoLock94
Summary: Dean finds Castiel but he isn't the same. It's a one shot, with a flash back in it.


**Hope you all enjoy this! It was inspired by this Tumblr post I found one day. Feel free to leave a comment for anything, give a thumbs if you liked it. This is a one shot, but one day I may write another chapter. (: Thanks for reading!**

Dean walked into the empty warehouse. Well, mostly empty. There were two vessels lying on the ground. They had been demons, nothing too special. But Dean had a feeling something wasn't all that right.

It had begun with a call coming over the police scanner, some strange sounds and activity coming from the place. They said it was a bunch of teenagers but Sam said he had a gut feeling that it was something _more. _He couldn't place his finger on it but he knew it was demons at play. Ever sense he drank the demon blood, he had been more acutely aware of those around him. His hunches were usually right and Dean wasn't going to start not listening.

They walked into the warehouse with rifles and the blade ready to stab. Cas had holy water ready and could make a devil's trap on the ground, Dean couldn't help but smile when he watched him do it.

Cas had fallen and it took almost three weeks before he had come to recognize where he was enough to call Dean to come get him. It was a bitter reunion and the ride home was quiet. Sam was mainly the only one to talk with Dean looking in the mirror. Every once in a while, Cas and Dean would make eye contact and nothing would be said but everything was understood.

Once back to the cave, all went to their separate rooms with Cas on the couch, not wanting to bother anyone. Later on that night, a light knock wrapped on Dean's door and when he found Ca there, he was more than surprised.

_He pulled open the door and found a half-asleep Cas standing in front of his door, swaying slightly with his trench coat half on and dragging on the floor._

"_Cas?"_

"_Dean? Can I come in?"_

"_Sure." Dean held open the door, making sure to not be loud. He held out his hand as Cas lost his balance and started leaning towards the wall. His hand caught him in the chest and his weight was all on Dean._

"_Whoa, hey, I gotchya." He walked him over to the bed and sat him on the side. He shut the door and knelt down in front of the half-conscious man. He was pale and cold, his hair more messed than usual. He wasn't right. His clothes were stained and he wreaked of alcohol. _

"_Cas, let's get you in the shower. Maybe it'll help." After getting a half comprehendible answer, he lifted him and put his arm around his neck, then Dean wrapped an arm around his waist, having already dropped the coat and tie. Luckily, the bathroom was close because Dean wasn't going to hold him much longer. He dropped him on the toilet and started the hot shower, letting water collect at the base. He turned to find Cas staring at the floor and muttering, his knuckles turning white with the tension in his fists. Dean rested his hands on Cas' knees. _

"_Cas, what it is?" He had a feeling he knew the answer._

"_It's all my fault. All of them fell because of me." His eyes were swimming in guilt, his face had it written in every crease of his face. When Cas looked Dean in the eyes, he felt his heart crush and swell at the same time for the innocent man sitting in front of him. Cas had a small part in the fall but he had been tricked then cast from Heaven himself. Dean swore he would do everything in his power to get back at Metatron for hurting Cas._

"_Cas, I'm not gonna bullshit and lie to you. You had a small part in the fall but you were wronged. It's not your fault that Metatron was a sonofabitch with a plan that we all were blind to it until it was too late." He still didn't look convinced._

"_Castiel. Please, listen to me." Dean placed his hands onto Cas', careful not to startle him. He finally looked up to meet Dean's eyes and a single tear fell down his check. He reached under his arms and stood him up against the wall. He started unbuttoning his shirt, his pants, and took off his shirt. Cas stood, what seemed only half-aware of what he was doing. _

"_Cas, listen to me. It's not your fault. You are going to shower and I will be here if you need anything. But shower and then we will get you dressed and get to sleep. You can stay in my room if you want. I don't want you to be alone and make a stupid mistake…" Dean closed his eyes and hated himself for what he said next but he knew it was what Cas needed to hear; "You're human now and if you get hurt, you can't fix it with a snap. And if something were to happen to you Cas… I don't know what I would do without you." Dean let his head drop as he finally said it, telling Cas how he felt in the easiest way he knew how. Once he realized Cas was lost, he refused to hide it any longer from him._

_A hand touched his chin, forcing him to lift his face to look at the one belonging to the hand. It was rough, calloused, warm, and it felt right. He closed his eyes as a feeling of calmness overwhelmed him. Castiel was doing this to him. The hand moved to his cheek and Dean didn't flinch away from the movement._

"_Thank you, Dean."_

_Cas leaned forward slowly until his breath could be felt on Dean's cheek. He opened his eyes and the blue ones read every detail, insecurity, worry, and memory that were within the green ones. Dean closed the space between them and chapped lips met his own. Neither moved away but neither pushed the limits. Once they were calmed down, Dean opened his mouth slightly and Cas did the same, leaning his forehead to Dean's. _

Now he walked into the warehouse and found Cas staring over a body, one that they couldn't save. Dean stopped dead in his tracks. A gun was cocked and ready in his hand and Cas seemed… different.

"Cas? You okay?"

He turned and his head was cocked to the side with no remorse, no sadness that had been engraved on his face for weeks, nothing but hatred and something new. The gun swung with ease in his hand as he started walking towards Dean. A smile was slowly crawling its way across Cas' face and it was not his own.

_"Being in an angel… not as pure as I would have expected. Some pretty messed up stuff in this head of his."_

_Dean took a step towards who he thought was Cas._

"You're not Cas." It was obvious. Nothing could have been more obvious at that moment. "Get _out_ of him." The threat was empty. He couldn't stab Cas if he wanted to. Even if it meant that he would die with his own soul in tack.

"Or what, you'll stab me with that little knife of yours? Because I'm just taking a shot in the dark here, but I think this vessel is a bit more important to you than some stranger."

Dean has no answer.

"Hmmm… A _lot_ more important, apparently."

He was in front of Dean now and walked around him slowly. He lifted his hand to cup Dean's face. He shoved back, no one but Cas was going to touch his face.

"How rude, Dean."

Next thing, Dean is flung into the opposite wall, falling to the ground in a crumpled mess. Blood trickled from his nose and the breath knocked out of him. He stood, and walked towards Cas' controlled body. He knocked Cas into the table and grabbed his hand, cuffing him and then to the chair. The cuffs were engraved with the devil's trap, meaning he or it, whatever it was, couldn't leave.

"You know, Castiel seems to like this. Someone is getting happy. And it's not because of the pizza man." Dean tried to act like he hadn't heard that bit of information. He grabbed the spray paint and started drawing a trap on the floor. He was going to exercise this mother.

"Wanna know something else?"

Dean continued to ignore him.

"He really truly does care about you Dean. He is also surprised that you even trust him. Also, you know he was going to kill himself that first night he stayed at the bunker? He couldn't live with the guilt that was overcoming him. But you seemed to stop him. He saw your jacket, _a jacket_, and remembered that he had to stay for you and for Sam."

"You're lying." This time, Dean couldn't stay quiet. He had enough of the bullshit. He knew Cas was guilt ridden, but nothing that he couldn't help him with. He _shouldn't _feel guilty for something he had no control over.

"Nope!" The "p" popped and another smile slid its way across his face.

Dean finished the trap, and picked up the chair and dragged "Castiel" over to the trap, taking off the cuffs and throwing the chair out of reach.

"You think that I am just going to stand here forever?"

"No. I am sending you straight back to hell and you can deal with them down there."

"You wouldn't."

"Why wouldn't I? I don't like you and you are just a mere stranger controlling my friends body. That's number one of the "things to do to piss off Dean" list."

"But I can tell you what is swimming around in Cassy's little head?" He poked the side of his head.

"I don't want to know in less it's from him, not someone controlling him." Dean had enough. He brought back the chair and tied Castiel to it. A piece of duct tape was over his mouth for good measure.

Dean leaned down in front of him, and hoped Cas himself could here him."Cas? Can you hear me? I need you to help me. Fight back. Fight against the thing that is in you. I know you can hear me. Think about all those moments we've had together. Remember the night we went to that club and I set you up with that girl? Think about that, how we laughed and had a good time. Think about how you drank your first beer with me. Please Cas, I need you to fight with me. I am getting that thing out of you."

He lifted Cas' head to look into his eyes and found a tear streaking his face. Cas had pushed to come back. He nodded his head.

Dean began the exorcism and Cas' body soon began to struggle against the rope, slamming the chair and sliding everywhere. His head began to shake his head, mumbling against the tape. Dean took it off just in time for the last bit of the exorcism.

"Ergo, draco maledicte et omnis legio diabolica, adjuramus te… cessa decipere humanas creaturas, eisque aeternae perditionis venenum propinare.

Ut Ecclisiam tuam secura tibi facias libertate servire, te rogamus, audi nos."

Black smoke piled out of Cas' mouth, a burning smell filling the room and the smoke crashed against the ceiling. His head fell limp, and his body relaxed against the chair. Blood dripped from his nose onto his lap. Dean quickly cut the rope off and caught his body before it hit the floor. He sat with him in his lap and rocked slowly, waiting and hoping that he would wake up.

Soon he began to stir and a confused Cas looked up at Dean.

"Dean?"

"Hey, you're okay. We are gonna go home. You're okay."

"Dean, what happened?"

"You- you were possessed, Cas."

The pained expression that crossed his face regretted Dean telling him anything instantly.

"But I'll explain when we get home. Okay?"

"Yeah, home.. sounds good."

Dean rested his forehead on Cas' and then he placed his lips against his. They stayed there for a second before Dean took him around his shoulders and lifted him up, walking him to the Impala. Sam stood waiting against the car and when he saw Cas, he rushed over to Dean to help him into the car. Once in the back seat, he laid Cas' head on his lap and ran his fingers through his hair. Sam started the car and took off, leaving the empty building behind them.

"What happened, Dean?"

"He was possessed. One of them must have been waiting somewhere else. Because this one was different than the other two."

"Is he okay?"

Dean looked down at the now silent man on his lap and didn't know how to answer.

"He is for now."


End file.
